from Into The Woods to Introitus

Day 931, Session 152:
When/Where: Tuesday January 13th - Basement, kitchen, living room. (aka laundry, dishes, pick-up)
First song: Into The Woods by My Morning Jacket
Last full song: Introitus by Wolfgang Amadeus Mozart
Progress: 2686-2700 of 6741
Total Songs Heard: 1979

Mozart totally had it right, definitely suffering form "Intro"-itus today. 11 of the 15 tunes were either "Intro"s or "Introductions" and that's not counting Mozart's Introitus which probably is just Latin for Intro. What flashed through my head while listening to 11 different intros?

1. Dave Matthew's fans are insane. They screamed and cheered through the entire 6:25 Intro to their Listener Supported concert cd. I will admit that I am not intimately familiar with Dave Matthew's concerts (although I have been to a few) and it is possible that the band was actually playing a song during Intro, but to me, it just sounded like the band was warming up on stage, and the crowd was eating it up.

2. I still don't understand why rap cds feel the need to include "skits" in with all the music. De La Soul failed twice, on "3 Feet High and Rising" and "De La Soul Is Dead," by starting the cd with lame skits. In fact, if I hadn't recently changed iPods, I wouldn't even have heard the skits. I removed them all from tracks that went on the old iPod. The old iPod was completely full so many things had to be cut. The new iPod is 5 times bigger, so everything goes on.

3. There's no reason to have an Intro track, even for a live concert, last longer than 1 minute. I understand the desire to give us a full concert experience, but if you're taking over a minute between when you're brought to the stage and when you start your first song, you need to seriously examine your performance style.

4. When I was in 2nd grade, there was a new girl. She wasn't in my 2nd grade class, Ms. Sullivan's, but in Mrs. Kintzel's class at the other end of the hall. She was kind of cute. My intro to her went something like this:

[Setting: School Cafeteria]
Me: [Walking up to her in the drink line] Hi Brooke. Is that like Brooke Shields?
Her: [Immediately kicks me directly in the shins, then turns and walks away.]
Me: Ouch!

That's it. That's all I remember about the girl. The whole thing took less than a minute, just like any good intro should.

from If I Had $1,000,000 to If I Had...

Day 874, Session 145:
When/Where: Monday November 17th - Afternoon chorefest: car/Jewel/home
First song: If I Had $1,000,000 by Barenaked Ladies
Last full song: If I Had A Rocket Launcher by Bruce Cockburn
Progress: 2133-2141 of 6069
Total Songs Heard: 1868

First of all, once again, F you iTunes. I won't bore you with the details of exactly why it happened, but when I started iTunes this morning, I had to rebuild my iTunes library. Just like the last time, after the initial rebuild, I had to re-rebuild the library because iTunes couldn't find over 1000 songs. I can understand why it would miss those songs since they were hidden away... in the iTunes folder. It's not a huge deal, except for the part where a big part of doing this project right means being able to track stats. Now all the stats are f-ed.

Anyway...
9 tracks, but only 4 different songs today. Started with 3 versions of If I Had $1,000,000. This is the song that launched my fandom of BNL. I had never heard of Barenaked Ladies (despite my affinity for scantily clad women) before my freshman year in college. 2nd semester Joey and I got a radio show and BNL showed up on our playlist. We were hooked immediately.

That started a whirlwind affair with BNL that saw me attend something like 8 shows in the space of 18 months. Of course this was also pre-One Week which meant you could go to a BNL show and actually get to be close to the band and do fun things like throw mac and cheese at the stage when they sang the "we wouldn't have to eat Kraft Dinner" line. I still love the guys today, but it hasn't been the same since their shows moved from mid-sized clubs into full-sized arenas.

If I Had $1,000,000 is also my "go to" karaoke song. The down side is you need someone to sing it with you, so I've occasionally ended up singing it with complete randoms. The upside is when you have someone who knows the song as well as you do, it's always a crowd pleaser. Kaylor and I have gotten compliments from strangers after our rendition.

If I had $1,000,000 I'd buy something nice for the wife, then we'd take a fun vacation. I'd bank the rest and attempt to live off the interest. After building up a few years of interest I'd probably buy a new place to live. I like where I live now, but if I could buy a really nice new condo or single family place that'd be even better. The new place would have a game room and I would buy an Addam's Family pinball machine and a pool table for that room.

I'm guessing everyone here is familiar with the song, so instead of the Gordon version here is live version from a 2004 Philly concert:

If I Had $1,000,00 - Barenaked Ladies

The 2nd song (actually the 4th, 5th, 6th, and 7th) heard was If I Had A Boat. It's a Lyle Lovett song, but the Lyle Lovett version is the last one I actually heard. I first found the Dave Matthews Band thanks to Napster in 2000, then the Eddie From Ohio and Jimmy Buffett covers. It's one of those songs that speaks to me for some reason. I think it's my chronic urge to get away from things.

If I really had a boat, I'm sure I'd have no idea what to actually do with it. I'm don't think I would take it out onto the ocean. Knowing me I'd sink the thing 1st time out. If I'm going to sink a boat I'd rather do it in a nice recreational lake. So I guess that means I don't really want to get away from things, I just want to be somewhere I can float and drink a beer. The pony would be a nice though. I could rent it out for kids parties and finally have a source of income. That is assuming of course that you make more money renting a pony out than you spend on the costs of pony upkeep. This may be a losing proposition all around.

If I Had A Boat - Lyle Lovett
If I Had A Boat - Eddie From Ohio
If I Had A Boat - Jimmy Buffett
If I Had A Boat - Dave Matthews Band

So if you had $1,000,000 and/or a boat (and pony,) what would you do?

Tuesday November 28th - A little later in the morning

Day 159, Session 57:
Location: At the desk at work. Practically the entire morning.
First song: Cowboy Romance by Natalie Merchant
Last full song: Crowing by Toad the Wet Sprocket
Progress: 758-779 of 4546
Total Songs Heard: 682

In college I went through a Dave Matthews phase. I don't think it was just me. I'm pretty sure if you went to college between 1994 and 2000 or so you went through a Dave Matthews phase too. Yeah, I liked the music. It was good to drink to and the ladies liked it. Both of those were good. The problem I had with Dave Matthews was the concerts. It's not that they weren't entertaining in concert, it's just that two of the most awkward days I ever spent were both at DMB concerts.

Summer after sophomore year I was supposed to go to a DMB concert in Columbus with what was supposed to be a large group of friends from college. Unfortunately as the concert grew closer more and more people backed out until it was me, a roommate, his friend from work, a girl from school and her boyfriend from home. Now the fact that this girl's boyfriend was coming along was a bit strange for me because I had spent the better part of the last semester at school flirting with this girl like mad. (Crash Into Me had been our unofficial flirting anthem, except for the last night of the semester when another DMB song took over.) It went from strange to terribly awkward when my roommate and his friend got a late start from Dayton, then got caught in a thunderstorm related traffic jam. Show time drew close and we couldn't wait any longer, so off we went to the show. Me, the girl... and her boyfriend. It was a strained few hours. The girl played it cool, the boyfriend had no idea... I spent a lot of time shifting uncomfortably (luckily it was a DMB concert, so I looked like just another white guy dancing.)

The second DMB concert gone bad occurred the following summer. I started the summer dating the wife's roommate, but that ended pretty quickly. After it ended however, she told me that she had bought a ticket for me to go to a DMB concert with her and her friends from high school (she apparently thought we'd still be together and wanted them to meet me, oops.) I was trying to still stay friendly with her (because I wanted to date her roommate) so, after she turned down my offer to pay for the ticket so she could give it to someone else, I agreed to go.

I was extremely uncomfortable with the whole idea and when she introduced me to her friends as "the guy who dumped me," I started feeling ill. In order to fight off the ill feelings I took some prescription meds that I was on at the time for my bad stomach. I knew I was in for a long day. Unfortunately a little later in the afternoon when my stomach was bothering me again (this time due to an unfortunate lunch choice at Steak & Shake) I took another dose of meds well before I should have. Two side effects of the medication? Increased sensitivity to light and heat. Now double those effects after double dosing and then try to sit in the mid-afternoon sun on a 90 degree July day. Not only was the situation as awkward as could be to begin with, but every minute sitting in the sun made me feel that much closer to passing out. Eventually I wandered off in a daze attempting to find some shade.

45 minutes of wandering later I accepted the fact that I had no idea where on the giant amphitheater lawn my group was seated. I took the best course of action I could think of. I staggered on stage, grabbed Boyd's violin and started playing Vivaldi's Spring. The band hired me to play second violin (my traditional preferred orchestral part) for the rest of the tour. I actually ended up touring with the band for 5 years until that fateful day when my stomach problems kicked up again as we crossed a bridge over the Chicago River. As part of the terms of the court settlement I had to leave the band AND stay in Chicago until my personal income taxes, city fees and parking tickets (mostly parking tickets) had paid off all the fines.