from If I Never See Your Face Again to Impossible Germany

Day 881, Session 146:
When/Where: Monday November 24th - car/Target/car/Best Buy/home
First song: If I Never See Your Face Again by Maroon 5
Last full song: Impossible Germany by Wilco
Progress: 2172-2196 of 6108
Total Songs Heard: 1893

It was busy afternoon of choring. For the first time, the wife and I are hosting a major family holiday. Both of our immediate families (Us, 4 parents, 2 sisters, 1 brother, 1 brother-in-law, 1 sister's +1, and a nephew in a pear tree (plus 2 dogs)) are coming to town for Thanksgiving dinner at our house. We bought the turkey and most of the dinner supplies Sunday afternoon. Since we were shopping together, I went iPod-less, which saved the good folks at Jewel another shot at hearing me sing as I walked through the aisles.

The Wife's birthday is on Thanksgiving (She claims it's on Thursday and Thursday just happens to be Thanksgiving, but I know for a fact her birthday is on Thanksgiving every year,) so I had to go out shopping again Monday to do some birthday shopping as well as final family prep. What Jewel got to avoid became Target's cross to bear, and what a cross it was.

Not too far along into my Target search for a baby gate (in order to nephew proof our basement stairs) came one of those songs that stops me in my tracks every time I hear it. I think I've mentioned before, I don't have a very complicated romantic history. I've had enough serious long-term relationships to count on both hands... as long as you limit yourself to not using fingers and only counting the entire hand as one. I did some sporadic dating in between the two relationships (sporadic in this case being code for "not much") but other than the high school girlfriend and The Wife, nothing really progressed beyond 'dating.'

Since I've ended half my long term relationships by getting married, I don't have a lot of relationship related regret. That's the weird thing about If It's The Beaches by The Avett Brothers. The song is so good, that it makes me wish I could apply it to my life. The longing lyrics and plaintive music hit hard, even at the start where it's just one voice and a guitar. And the way it builds... voice and guitar, then violin/cello/second guitar, then finally at 2:35... piano. The piano isn't playing power chords either, but it fills the space in the song in such way that it sounds like Seth Avett has spent the whole song building up this alternate relationship history and if you, the other end of this lost relationship, could just hear it... Hear the words, hear the music, hear how the whole world will be full again if only you could go back.

Like I said, I can't really relate, and yet, apparently I can.

If It's The Beaches - The Avett Brothers (highly recommended as a headphone song, the build of the song through headphones fills my entire head.)

As an added bonus, here's a high quality video (you are watching all your youtube in high quality right?) from a show I went to in Newport, Kentucky earlier this year. I can't be seen in the video, I was slightly behind the throng on the left.



But wait there's more: I also don't understand working on a farm with my family and some migrant workers, but that doesn't change the fact that this song will be my official morning wake up once I do go back to work. I hate the morning, but I think if I'm waking up to the Sunparlour Players I won't hate it quite as much. (As long as the creeks don't actually rise.)

If The Creeks Don't Rise - Sunparlour Players (also headphone recommended)

Now for something I do understand: Swedish furniture. In my little section of the living I am surrounded by Ikea. My computer desk is Ikea and we have three Billy-the-bookcases ("Hello.") I was living in Philly when the first U.S.-based Ikea opened in New Jersey. I never understood why it was such a big deal until I needed to buy my own furniture (as opposed to stealing it from my parents basement.) Now I totally understand why New Jersey has a "God-damned Swedish parade." The only downside of this song is once you hear it a few times, you'll never be able to go to Ikea again without humming the song to yourself. Ah the genius of Coulton.

Ikea - Jonathan Coulton

Happy Thanksgiving everybody. If we manage to survive the family visit, I'll see you next week.

from I Am Part... to I Can't Wait

Day 793, Session 135:
When/Where: Thursday August 21st - Another jog/walk up and down the street.
First song: I Am Part Of A Large Family by Great Lake Swimmers
Last full song: I Can't Wait by William Topley
Progress: 2068-2078 of 6049
Total Songs Heard: 1712

I've picked a bad weekend to go out of town. If you're in Chicago this weekend (perhaps you're coming into town to take my place as I head out,) I recommend setting up camp at Schubas. Friday night at 10 you'll get to see Great Lake Swimmers. GLS are Canadian and relaxed and folksy which are all things I tend to like (man do I miss Fruvous.) While I've never seen them in concert, if I was going to be in town I'm pretty sure I'd find their show to be a place where I could sit back and be enveloped by the music. And yes, I realize that wanting a concert to be a relaxing experience is just one more sign of my march into old.

I Am Part Of A Large Family - Great Lake Swimmers

Saturday night at 7, Garrison Starr is back in town. You may remember Garrison from this post. Well besides the fact that she was fun to hang out with, Garrison also put on a great show. I think this will make the 2nd time she's been back to Chicago since that awesome drunken karaoke filled night, and it's also the second time I'll be out of town. Again, if I were here, I'd be there. (She's appearing with Jim Bianco. I don't know him. I'll assume Jim is the brother of my middle school principal Mike Bianco, so don't misbehave or he may give you detention.)

I won't be at the shows this weekend because I'll be in Sea Isle City hanging out with the family and celebrating the first birthday of my nephew Orion.

Check this kid out:


Pretty awesome I know. In the hopes of eventually helping out the national team, this weekend I'm going to teach him to fall down and roll around on the ground in pain any time someone bumps him when he's near the ball.

So what kind of gifts do I get for a 1-year old? Music of course. Snack Time from Barenaked Ladies and Here Come The ABCs from They Might Be Giants. Sure the kid is only one and may not get them yet, but what does anyone really 'get' when they're one?

It should be a fun weekend. Hope your weekend is fun too.

(and yes, I realize it is somewhat shocking that I've posted twice in less than 24 hours.)

from Home Soon to Hopelessly Devoted

Day 672, Session 124:
When/Where: Tuesday April 22nd - Mopping the kitchen floor - ah glamorous life (someone please give me a job!)
First song: Home Soon by Oh Susanna
Last full song: Hopelessly Devoted To You by Clem Snide
Progress: 1983-1996 of 5889
Total Songs Heard: 1588

Three versions of Homeward Bound today, two proper Simon and Garfunkel versions and one off the cuff concert version from Fruvous. Hearing these songs got me to realizing that this particular musical treasure has absolutely no application to my life whatsoever.

When I was growing up, my Dad (at approximately the same age I am now) was going out of town all the time for work. He spent days upon days working and driving around Nowhere, West Virginia and Middle Of, Kentucky. Actually I believe he used to go to Hazard. Every time he got back from Hazard I asked him if he saw the Dukes. He never did (probably because the Dukes were in Hazzard, Georgia, not Hazard, Kentucky.)

Back when she was an engineer, the wife spent a lot of time on the road, mostly in Florida.

Even my professional student friends take extended trips away from home to exotic places like Antarctica and Rwanda.

I have been on exactly one business trip in my life. I went to Portland, Oregon and wasn't gone long enough to start thinking about Homeward Bound. I know everyone who does travel for business eventually tires of it, but there's a part of me that is really excited by the idea. So, yeah, if you've got a job to offer me, don't hold back just because it involves travel. I'd even be willing to get a passport.



Two other things I head today that I wanted to share. Being a nerd, I'm a big Weird Al fan, and one of my favorite things he does are his mash-up polkas, so here's one I heard today:

Hooked On Polkas - Weird Al

And being a theater nerd, I suppose I'm contractually obligated to be a fan of "Grease." The movie is ridiculous and I hold a grudge against the stage version based on the time I was on the crew and I almost had my ankle crushed while moving a piece of scenery, but I do like the music well enough. I especially like this cover by Eef Barzelay. He takes all of Olivia Newton John's manufactured Australian-playing-1950's angst and completely blows it out.



One more thing about "Grease." At the end of the movie when Sandy goes from good-girl to bad-ass-leather-girl... am I the only one who finds the transformation totally unattractive? I mean, completely ignoring the "you have to change yourself to get your man" message that it sends, I just find her hotter when she's playing the good girl. Am I the only one? Please use the poll over on the right to tell me whether I'm right, or whether I'm crazy.

from Holly Up to Home For A Rest

Day 665, Session 123:
When/Where: Tuesday April 15th - Walking to the post office to mail taxes, then running home.
First song: Holly Up On Poppy by XTC
Last full song: Home For A Rest by Great Big Sea
Progress: 1975-1980 of 5894
Total Songs Heard: 1574

Good news and bad news from the running project. The good news: This particular run was the first time I managed to go a full mile without breaking into a walk. Now I know, you're probably thinking that a mile isn't all that much, and I tend to agree but I've gotta start somewhere right? The key to this whole project (both this one and the running one) is to keep everything from getting painful. If things get painful, they're no longer fun and if something isn't fun, why in the world would I keep doing it? So yeah, a mile and it wasn't that bad.

The bad: What was bad was when I decided to walk back from I.O. that night in a different pair of shoes. It was a two mile walk and by the end I knew I had new and exciting blisters on my feet. Stupid feet. As a side note, the single most looked at page of this blog is the entry that has a picture of my blistered foot. Makes me wonder if besides my 10 (that's right we're in double figures!) loyal readers, all I'm really doing here is disappointing a bunch of foot fetishists.

As far as the music goes, there were 4 straight songs about home. On a recent trip back to Philadelphia for a cousin's wedding my entire family stopped by our old house in Havertown. The family that owns the house now (not the people we sold to) were all out in the yard, so (much to our embarrassment) our parents got out and started talking to them. They invited us to come in a look around and see the changes they had made to the place. It was strange. (So strange that all the significant others stayed in the car.) The house looked like I remembered it, yet at the same time I couldn't muster up any connection to the place. I lived there for 5 years, but it may have well have been the first time I walked in there.

This only furthers my earlier theory (a theory that I'm sure I'me the only person to ever come up with) that a place doesn't make a home, people do.

I will say though, when you're out running and you're tired and you've gone farther than you have in a while, the physical place is home enough. Home For A Rest came just as I was finishing the mile and doing a quick cool down walk, sometimes song timing is eerie appropriate.

Home - Barenaked Ladies
Home For A Rest - Great Big Sea

from Highway One to Holly Tominack

Day 664, Session 122:
When/Where: Monday April 14th - Back to the traditional running (around to the post office and grocery store.)
First song: Highway One by William Topley
Last full song: Holly Tominack by Moxy Früvous
Progress: 1948-1974 of 5894
Total Songs Heard: 1568

Two bad songs (not surprisingly from the Metal Ballads collection) get the boot. Hold On by Roko (who?) and Holiday by the Scorpions are no longer part of my music collection.

The weirdest thing I heard today came from Rockapella. You may remember them as the guys who sang the theme song to "Where In The World Is Carmen Sandiego?" Well, now you can also remember them as the guys who included a Folger's commercial on their cd.

Holiday Wake Up - Rockapella

That's weird, right? To include a commercial jingle on your CD?

I was also surprised to find that Hold Her Down by Toad The Wet Sprocket had been censored at some point while I wasn't paying attention. Hold Her Down was the first song I ever owned that contained the word "fuck." I remember how red faced I went when I forgot about the expletive and we listened to Fear on one of those long family car rides to Pittsburgh. Mom and Dad didn't say anything about it, but I know they were silently judging me (and probably still are.)

Now it doesn't say fuck anymore. I'm not sure why they felt the need to remove it. I remember being surprised that Toad had a song with "fuck" in it, but it made sense since it's a song about sexual assault. (Toad was heavily involved raising money for women's crisis centers.) Apparently some time between 1992 and 1999 the word fuck became so offensive that it had to be eliminated. Strange. (Fucking strange even.)

Hold Her Down (Remix) - Toad The Wet Sprocket

Finally, I love songs that start with counting.

Holland, 1945 - Neutral Milk Hotel

Edited much later to add: Lots of folks have ended up at this page in search of the Fruvous tune about Holly Tominack. Let it never be said that I am not hear to serve (as long as the song I'm serving is not something I'm going to get a lot of shit from the RIAA for reposting.)

Holly Tominack - Moxy Fruvous.

from Happy Birthday to Happy, The End

Day 604, Session 112:
When/Where: Thursday February 14th - In the air between Chicago and Nashville.
First song: Happy Birthday by Clem Snide
Last full song: Happy, The End by The Innocence Mission
Progress: 1786-1796 of 5773
Total Songs Heard: 1418

It was time for my biannual trip to Nashville. (BTW, did you know that biannual and semiannual mean the same thing? You did? Oh. I had to look it up. As far as I know the prefix 'bi-' means 2 and the prefix 'semi-' means 1/2, so how can biannual and semiannual mean the same thing? English man... just one more reason to move to Finland and learn to speak Finnish.) There's about 40 minutes of usable air time between Chicago and Nashville and most of that time was spent hearing songs about different types of happy birthdays.

Seeing as how I am just 2 weeks removed from a birthday and then I hit this particular run of songs I took the time on the flight to order a jack and coke and reflect on birthdays past. Here are the ones I remember:

1978 - I turned 2. I don't actually remember this birthday, but according to photographic evidence I made a real mess of myself while enjoying some chocolate cake. Guests included my parents, Great-Great Grandmother and next door neighbors.

1981 - I turned 5 and we had a party at my house. Using the power of static electricity (and probably tape) my name was up on the dining room wall constructed entirely of balloons. I thought this was pretty much the coolest thing ever. Also, somewhere my parents found gigantic balloon. I spent a lot of the party wrestling the balloon with Zach Hafer playing the role of my tag team partner. Other guests included Mike Vardaro and Eddie Atkinson.

1984 - I turned 8 and we watched Herbie Goes To Monte Carlo in the basement of my house. This was a big deal because at the time, my family didn't own a VCR. We actually had to rent one (along with the movie) from the local West Coast Video (why West Coast Video was a big chain on the East Coast I still don't understand.) This was a big deal at the time. Guests included Mike again and the girl I had a crush on at the time Alanna. At least I'm pretty sure that's her name (Mike will confirm once he reads this.)

1987 - I turned 11 and a few of the guys came over for a sleep over. At this point we owned a VCR so I'm sure some type of movie was watched. If I had to guess I'd say there's also a pretty good chance we spent part of that overnight watching the Playboy Channel which came in scrambled (but not very well) on channel 19. What can I say, even at age 11 boobs were fascinating. Guests included Mike, and Brendan Roan.

1992 - I turned 16 and my parents through my one and only surprised party. The surprise totally worked. I had no idea. My dad told me he needed my help moving some boxes at his office and offered to pay me for my time. Since I didn't actually have any Friday night plans (yep, I was a winner back then too) I agreed. I had just had my hair buzzed almost entirely off, and it turned out that under all that hair, I had a very tiny head. Any time I think about getting my hair cut extremely short I think back to the pictures taken at this party. Guests included Mike, Brian McIntire and my cadre of K-named girl friends Kristin, Kerstin, Kierstin, and Kate.

1995 - I turned 19 at college. We played Twister in Joey and Ryno's room. We also played the very dangerous game of "how many people can we fit on the top bunk of that bunk bed?" (The answer was 14.) To the best of my knowledge, no alcohol was served this night. This would be the last time that would happen. Mike was not there, Joey, Ryno, Missy, and Mary were.

1996 - 20, still at college. This year we had 21-year old connections. We filled the mini fridge with beer and played Revolution (a more genteel version of Asshole.) Guests included Joey, Ryno, Jay, and Becky.

1997 - 21. I became the 21-year old connection as I was the first one in our house to hit the milestone. I celebrated my birthday proper by walking into the UDF at 12:03 am and buying two 40s. Which Joey and I then enjoyed on the porch of our house on the dark side. Later that day I bought my first keg. The house was full of people all party long and any time anyone saw me with less than half a beer, they poured some out of their glass into mine. Eventually I was drunk to the point where I knew I had to stop drinking, so I wandered upstairs and put myself to bed. The party went on for a few more hours without me. Guests included lots of people I didn't know, but who seemed to know me.

1999 - 23. Went to a Fruvous concert where the guys proceeded to play a multiple song encore dedicated to my birthday (this track will be posted when we hit the 'M's.) I think this is my favorite birthday. Guests included Joey, Sarah, Betsy.

2005 - 29. My sisters both came to visit for the weekend. We ordered deep dish pizza and they baked me a cake. A few days later we watched the Eagles in the Super Bowl. Even though it was my birthday, they refused to win. Except for the losing Super Bowl part, this birthday was pretty good too. Guests included The Wife, Kate, Alicia, and Potsie.

As you can see, I got a lot of remembering done during the very short flight. I saw recently there's going to be a game show where you're quizzed on things that happened in the course of your own life. I think I would be pretty good at it. (As long as they don't quiz me on too many things that happened this past weekend. I often come back from Nashville a little foggy.)

Happy Birthday - Clem Snide
Happy Birthday - Sufjan Stevens
Happy Birthday - Weird Al Yankovic

from Goodnight Saigon to Greetings

Day 587, Session 108:
When/Where: Monday January 28th - Wandering around Dominicks, trying to figure out why there are so many varieties of balsamic vinaigrette.
First song: Goodnight Saigon by Billy Joel
Last full song: Greetings to the New Brunette by Billy Bragg
Progress: 1671-1700 of 5687
Total Songs Heard: 1361

When I was six, my family took a trip across country in an RV. It was a truly incredible trip. I saw a lot of the country that, if it weren't for the trip, I know I still wouldn't have seen today. (Somehow I don't think any trips to Cody, Wyoming would have been taken by this point.) I don't remember much about the long hours spent in that camper, but I do remember listening to an extraordinary amount of country music. Which is strange because I don't really come from a country music family. Growing up the radio was generally set to the local adult contemporary stations (Magic 103 and Sunny 104.5 for those Philly folks who can remember back that far.) But I guess my parents thought country music was better traveling music. So I heard a lot of Kenny Rogers, Linda Ronstadt, Dolly Parton, and most of all, John Denver.

Without a doubt, my favorite John Denver song back in the day was Grandma's Feather Bed. As I was listening to it today (twice actually, there was also a live version) I realized once again, that as much as I love the song, I still have no idea what several lines in the refrain are.

I know the first two lines:

It was 9 feet high and 6 feet wide
Soft as a downy chick.

And then things start getting hazy:

It was made from the feathers of (fort eleven?) geese.

WTF are Fort Eleven geese? A specific breed secretly grown by the military for their extra soft feathers? Hey, at least I knew were were talking about geese, next line I'm completely lost:

Took a whole ford a paws for a tick(?!?)

What in god's name is a ford of paws? And isn't it bad if the bed has ticks? Really, I have absolutely no idea what that line is. I went back and listened to it 20 times, but still, nothin'. Still, I have reasonably clear memories of singing along at the top of my lungs whenever this song would come on during the trip. But what on earth was I singing?

And yes, I realize through this magical series of tubes that I could use the google and find out exactly what that line is, but I think I like it better not knowing. What do you hear?

Grandma's Feather Bed - John Denver

Postscript to the country music in the camper... eventually the tape deck ate the John Denver tape and we had to spend the last part of the trip (Yosemite back to Philly) listening to whatever was on the radio. Not surprisingly, it was mostly country.

This day also brought two Früvous songs that I do happen to know all the words to. Gord's Gold is from the "B" cd. It is my favorite one minute song ever. I kept hoping that eventually an entire full length version of the song was going to come out, but alas it was not to be. The song is a tribute to Canadian folk singer Gordon Lightfoot, if you're not familiar with him, the song probably won't mean much, but if you know him, you'll recognize the song is spot on.

The other song is a 'rare' Früvous track that, to my knowledge, isn't included on any of their cds. It was originally released on their indie cassette in Canada (damn, another time the canucks get over on me!) but never included on any commercially released cds (probably due to the fact that the good Dr. Seuss didn't sign off on it.) I saw the guys in concert 10 times and only saw this song done once (Ludlow's in Cbus.)

Gord's Gold - Moxy Früvous
Green Eggs and Ham - Moxy Früvous

Finally, this made me laugh out loud in the middle of the snack aisle. (Doritos' Hot Wings & Blue Cheese Collision, hooray!) If you don't already subscribe to The Onion Radio News podcast, you really should.

Greenpeace Releases Dolphins - The Onion

from Get Older to Ghetto Thang

Day 556, Session 104:
When/Where: Friday December 28th - Live from Vegas.
First song: Get Older by Matthew Sweet
Last full song: Ghetto Thang [Ghetto Ximer] by De La Soul
Progress: 1531-1538 of 5544
Total Songs Heard: 1242

Seems fitting that one of the songs from the last batch of the year would be Getting Better by The Beatles. As much as I whine and complain things really did get better in 2007. A small sampling (in no particular order:)

Upgraded to the fantastic new world of both HDTV and a DVR. I've always loved my TV and 2007 has made me love it even more.
Left a job that was no longer any good for me.
Remodeled our kitchen which included installing a dishwasher. I don't have a lot of relationship advice to give, but here's one thing that has served me well: If you're going to move in with your significant other, make sure you have a dishwasher.
Acquired a Wii, which has led to an unexpected amount of video game enjoyment (including watching my Dad play a video game for the first time in years and my Mom play for the first time ever.)
Performed another wedding.
Became a first time uncle.
Left Vegas ahead for the first time.
Watched my beloved Dayton Flyers win 2 games on ESPN.
Continued to have a great family and of course...
I have a fantastic wife.

Those are just things that I thought of while looking around my living room. I'm sure if I really put some brain power to it, I'd be able to come up with more.

There's no reason to think that pattern won't continue on into 2008. Whatever job I get next will have to be better than what I left. The kitchen remodel is the first (and biggest) part of our continuing efforts to make the house a home. The nephew will get out of that new baby phase and start to get to the age where you can really have fun with kids. Video games will continue to be fun. My cable system is adding more HD channels. Vegas... well, Vegas will probably get me back, but I still love Vegas. Dayton enters 2008 ranked! Hopefully I'll get to see family more. The wife will continue to be herself, which is to say, great.

Sorry if I've alarmed anyone with the unprecedented burst of optimism (even I'm surprised I didn't focus on Get Older,) but why not end/start the year on a positive note?

One more positive thing that will happen this year. Surely I will make more progress than the (pathetic) amount of progress made in 2007. It was a shockingly low number, even considering the 'break' I took to catch up. How low? Let's just say that 2 songs a day will be an improvement.

Getting Better - The Beatles

from Flowers In The Windows to Fontanelle

Day 486, Session 97:
When/Where: Sunday October 21st - Aboard Southwest flight 499 from Philadelphia to Chicago.
First song: Flowers In The Windows by Travis
Last full song: Fontanelle by Clem Snide
Progress: 1385-1399 of 5413
Total Songs Heard: 1142

Synergy people, synergy. I hit the section of songs that start with the word fly while I was in an airplane, flying back from Philadelphia. You couldn't plan this stuff any better. I managed to hear seven 'different' songs that started with fly. Different is in quotes because they were actually only 4 different songs. I have 3 versions of Fly by Moxy Fruvous and 2 versions of Fly From Heaven by Toad the Wet Sprocket. As an added bonus, the other two fly songs were by the same guy: John Denver.

I'd be lying if I didn't say it creeped me out a little to hear John Denver singing about flying while I myself was in an airplane. Luckily my flight ended without incident (of course all of his flights did too until the last one.)

The reason I was in a plane to begin with? I was flying back from Philadelphia where I served as the officiant at my cousin's wedding. This was actually my second wedding as Reverend Matt. My first was last summer for my sister and brother-in-law. That one went extremely smoothly as they had written out every single word that I was going to say during the ceremony. I got a hold of everything with enough time to add a few personal touches. It ended up being a fantastic experience all the way around.

This past weekend was also an experience. Not as much content was written for me before hand (just the vows,) so I surprised myself by writing a 15-minute ceremony just a few hours before things were supposed to get underway. Things ended up going great and of course the important part was that the bride and groom were satisfied (and married) at the end... but man oh man was it stressful.

The good news is, if you're getting married and need a Reverend, I have a ceremony written and ready to go.

The final song of the day tied in nicely to the whole wedding vibe. Fontanelle by Clem Snide was the song that I danced with my Mom with at my wedding. Due to the song's prayer like quality, I actually wanted it as part of our ceremony but apparently the Catholics have rules about what can and cannot be sung in a church. But if you're going to have me do your wedding, you should know that I have no such rules. You can definitely use this song.

Fontanelle - Clem Snide

Oh, and just so you don't have to look it up... fontanelle is the soft spot at the top of a baby's head. (The title of the cd the song is on? "Soft Spot".)

from Fallin to Fare Thee Well

Day 435, Session 91:
When/Where: Friday August 31st - Heading home for the holiday weekend.
First song: Fallin by De La Soul Ft. Teenage Fanclub
Last full song: Fare Thee Well by Indigo Girls
Progress: 1268-1281 of 5288
Total Songs Heard: 1052

Passed the "Family" section of titles today, including the song Family Tree by Ben Kweller. I've actually been thinking quite a bit about the old family tree recently, what with my recently becoming an uncle and all. I've been lucky with my tree. It's been very straight forward and easy to understand. My parents have stayed together so there's no extra branching for step- or half- siblings. My grandparents were the same way, so there's only 4 of them to worry about. I grew up with all the parents and grandparents (along with a bunch of aunts, uncles, and cousins) involved in my life, so there's no tricky question marks along the way. Not that there's anything wrong with step-siblings or the occasional intriguing question mark, but my simple mind has enough trouble keeping track of the number of relatives I have.

4 grandparents (although I've had 6 grandparent figures in my life, the rest of the tree gets way complicated if I start down that road.)
2 parents
2 sisters
8 aunts & uncles related by blood (not counting their spouses)
13 1st cousins
and now 1 nephew.

Any theoretical kids of mine are going to have an even smaller tree than I do; the wife and I only combine for 3 siblings. I guess it's getting that way all over. As time goes on the family unit keeps shrinking. Don't need as many kids to mind the farm or to go to work to help pay the bills. I'm not doing anything to help the situation either. I wonder if somewhere down the line the ever shrinking American family will come back and bite us in the ass.

I suppose as long as we have die-hard Catholics and ineffective abstinence-only teaching in school we don't have much to worry about.

Family Tree - Ben Kweller

from F.O.D. to Fallible

Day 434, Session 90:
When/Where: Thursday August 30th - Desk to train, train to Belmont, 1.5 mile walk home.
First song: F.O.D. by Green Day
Last full song: Fallible by Blues Traveler
Progress: 1256-1271 of 5300
Total Songs Heard: 1038

The problem with occasionally posting to my MySpace blog, besides the inevitable question as to why exactly I have a MySpace account (the answer: I'm 12,) is that I ended up posting there something that would have fit in pretty well here. Or at least it would have fit in pretty well with the woe-is-me attitude of the more recent posts. Anywho, if you want to read it, there's a link over on the right.

And some good news (that still has nothing to do with music...) I am now officially an uncle. Congrats to the sister on the birth of Orion Francis. I've been holding off on that announcement until she posted about it on her own blog. Took her almost a week... I couldn't figure out why it took so long but then she mentioned something about having a newborn baby, so I guess that's understandable.

From the music front today I heard one of those songs that shocks me into remembering that apparently, I may actually have a romantic side. Fallen For You by Sheila Nicholls is from the High Fidelity soundtrack. (I've previously mentioned my affinity for that particular film.) It's a piano-driven gut punch tale of unrequited love; and really, who among us hasn't been there? She does a great job of laying out that feeling of longing for someone so much... and yet knowing it's just not going to work out. How you play that game with yourself of pretending like you don't care around the other person and yet wishing that they would see right through your facade. Such a pretty song; the type of thing you could play for a first dance at a wedding... until you listen to the words and realize that it's completely inappropriate seeing as how it's about specifically NOT finding love.

Kind of like how More Than Words by Xtreme sounds like a really nice love song until you listen to the words and figure out that they're basically saying, "If you really loved me, we'd be having sex right now."

Fallen For You - Sheila Nicholls

from Dutch Wonderland to Earthquakes

Day 218, Session 78:
When/Where: Friday January 26th - In the air between Chicago and Nashville.
First song: Dutch Wonderland by Josh Joplin
Last full song: Earthquakes by Moxy Fruvous
Progress: 1053-1059 of 4791
Total Songs Heard: 906

Busy day here. Rolled the song count over from 899 to 900 (Dutch Wonderland by Josh Joplin) and moved the alphabet from D(ysfunctionally Yours by Wally Pleasant) to E(arly Morning Rain by Gordon Lightfoot). All this while listening outside of my normal train/work based comfort zone (flying down to Nashville for a weekend of drinking/hockey/video games/trivia/drinking.)

Since we've run off another 100 songs, it's time to do the math:

906 songs in 218 days = 4.16 songs per day
4791-1059 = 3732 tracks to go
Of 1059 tracks so far, 153 (1059-906) have been skipped/podcasts/added later/whatever = 14.4% skipped
3732-(3732*14.4%) = approximately 3195 songs to go accounting for skipped tracks
3195 songs/4.16 songs a day = 768 days to go (2.1 years)
Estimated time of project completion = March 2009

Well, that's still slower than I'd like to be. At this point reaching my goal of getting through this entire project by the end of 2007 seems to be a bit of the pipe dream. (Especially considering I haven't made any progress outside of writing these catch up posts for almost 4 months now.)

Dutch Wonderland was actually a place I visited several times during my childhood. Man did I love Holland. Kidding! Dutch Wonderland had nothing at all to do with Holland. Anyone who grew up in Eastern Pennsylvania will tell you that Dutch Wonderland was named that way because it is in the heart of Pennsylvania Dutch Country and that the Pennsylvania Dutch were actually from Germany not The Netherlands. Dutch was a mispronunciation of Deutsch which managed to stick through the years.

Anywho, Dutch Wonderland is an amusement park for kids. But aren't all amusement parks for kids? Well yes, but this place is basically full of rides for people 4'6" and under. There are no looping roller coasters. There is a ride called the Lady Gay River Boat Cruise. (I can't decide if that is open minded or oblivious.) Many of the shows are described as edutainment. They don't serve beer. Yes I realize that sounds kind of lame now, but when I was a kid I absolutely loved it.

My family used to go there at least once a summer. I specifically remember one trip where we loaded the family plus a few more (Mike, I'm pretty sure you were there) into the blue Chevy station wagon (it was exciting because we sat in the back (this was in the days before seat belts)) and we rode the log flume about 20 times. Even when we took my little sister there (she's 7 years younger) I still enjoyed it. I'm pleased to report that Dutch Wonderland is still around so if I should ever have kids, I will take them there (and also to Sesame Place.)

The funny thing about Dutch Wonderland the song (which I love) is that it's a melancholy look back on all the innocence Dutch Wonderland the amusement park represents. I should probably focus on that but, well, how hard is it to decide to be in a good mood and be in a good mood once in a while?

Dutch Wonderland - Josh Joplin

from Diamonds to Disseminated

Day 190, Session 67:
When/Where: Friday December 29th - Lounging poolside in Miami at high noon.
First song: Diamonds On The Souls Of Her Shoes by Paul Simon
Last full song: Disseminated by Soul Coughing
Progress: 914-942 of 4785 (2 podcasts skipped)
Total Songs Heard: 801

800! Song 800 was Disillusion by Badly Drawn Boy. With another 100 songs past, it's time to do the math.

801 songs in 190 days = 4.22 songs per day
4785-942 = 3843 tracks to go
Of 942 tracks so far, 141 (942-801) have been skipped/podcasts/added later/whatever = 15% skipped
3843-(3843*15%) = approximately 3267 tracks to go accounting for skipped tracks
3267 tracks/4.22 songs a day = 774 days to go (2.1 years)
Estimated time of project completion = February 2009

Excellent! I've picked up 1 month between songs 700 and 800. {Spoiler Alert - That's not going to last!} I was listening to these songs while taking a few days between Christmas and New Years to hang out with my family in Miami. The Wife, my Mom and sisters were all having a "spa day" which left my Dad and I to fend for ourselves. We dealt with the situation the best way we knew how. We hung out by the pool (but didn't actually get in) and drank.

There are a lot of beautiful people in Miami. Needless to say, I didn't really fit in all that well. Something about not having any outfits where each piece cost more than a car payment. It was ok though. I had everything I really needed: a good pair of sunglasses ($15 from CVS) so that I could look at the beautiful people without being obviously about it and a bar at the ready.

In honor of all the beautiful people in Miami, I present one beautiful pop song. Did I Say by Teenage Fanclub is all harmonies and awesome. This video doesn't quite do justice to the goodness of the song (the sound is a little muddled) but I think it conveys the general idea of how great the song is. I was going to link the actual song for you all (that's right, all 5 of you) to enjoy, but alas, I downloaded it from iTunes, and those guys hate sharing (unless you're willing to pay an extra 30 cents a song.)

Trust me, it sounds even better in your headphones by the pool with the Atlantic Ocean just over there.

Friday October 27th

Day 127, Session 49:
Location: Training away from work before hitting reheasal
First song: Christmas of Love by Little Isidore & The Inquisitors
Last full song: Circles by Soul Coughing
Progress: 646-659 of 4482
Total Songs Heard: 574

Made it through all the Christmas songs today, or at least all the ones that start with the word Christmas. Turns out there were 16 of them. That works out fine for writing this now, but was a bit strange in late October when these first came around. The Christmas Eve shopping trip with my sister once again worked to perfection. In fact, this year we improved on the trip by finding the back exit from the shopping center. Waiting in traffic to escape the Best Buy/Barnes and Noble parking lot? Totally for suckers.

I can't quite understand why Christmastime (Oh Yeah) doesn't get play on any of those 24-hour-a-day-from-Thanksgiving-through-Christmas stations. It's family friendly, it's got nice Christmas style harmonies, Barenaked Ladies will play on any radio station that isn't hard rock or R&B (and how many of those stations play Christmas music anyway?) but I've never heard it. I imagine it's almost impossible to break a new Christmas song on to one of those stations. I'm pretty sure they've been playing the same loop of music since the mid-80s (right after Do They Know It's Christmas? came out.) Just one more super annoying thing about the state of corporate radio.

The only thing that does change from year-to-year on those stations is those horrible "Special Christmas Wish" promos that they play. You know the one. The radio station (through the generous support of listeners like you) has bought Christmas presents for the poor family that is undergoing some hard times this holiday season. You know, Ma was laid off from the whoopie cushion plant and Pa is still in prison and Grandma has the scurvy and Junior has that terrible speech impediment that leads to all the other kids calling him "Stinky" (kids can be so non-sensical when they're cruel.) "Well," the soft-voiced DJ says, "we know how hard this Christmas is for you, so we've bought Tickle Me Elmos and Nicorette gum for everyone. All it will cost you is your dignity cause we'll be playing this promo every 22 minutes for the next 32 days." And then Ma blubbers into the phone, but not before remembering to drop the station catch phrase in there.

Meanwhile, I throw up in my car, but at least I wasn't waiting in traffic.

Merry Christmas everybody!

Thursday October 19th - Morning

Day 119, Session 41:
Location: At the desk, writing important documents.
First song: C'mon Daddy by The Lemonheads
Last full song: Call and Answer by Barenaked Ladies
Progress: 541-549 of 4500
Total Songs Heard: 467

California was covered today. California by Mason Jennings, California Rolls by Janes Addiction, and California Stars by Billy Bragg & Wilco. Honestly I thought I'd have more songs about California. Truth be told, California Rolls could be about sushi for all I know. I've tried listening to it, and I still don't quite get it.

I've visited California quite a few times. When I was 6, my family spent a pretty large percentage of our RV trip cross country in California. We covered San Diego, LA, San Francisco, and Yosemite. I have a lot of memories from that trip that have kind of ended up smashing together in my head, but all the parts of the California portion stand out individually. I remember visiting Disney Land outside LA and being less than impressed because we had been to Disney World the year before. I remember cable cars and a guy trying to extricate himself from a straight jacket in San Fran. I remember giant redwoods and nature everywhere around Yosemite.

My most specific memory though is from San Diego. We went to the zoo. We were looking down on the hippo habitat. One of the hippos pointed his ass out of the water and let loose an amazing explosion of green hippo shit everywhere. My family laughed and laughed. It's probably one of my top 5 most vivid memories from that fantastic 6-week trip. I'm not sure if I remember it because of the absurdity of the scene or because of how hard we laughed.

I hope when I have kids I'll be able to share experiences with them that will stay with them for years and years. Even if they involve hippo shit.

Wednesday June 28th - Morning

Day 6, Session 5:
Location: The morning commute... walk and train.
First song: Action by Clem Snide
Last full song: Adlib 2 by Barenaked Ladies
Progress: 96-105 of 3962

Clem Snide is one of those groups that I most probably never would have discovered were it not for someone else saying, "Hey, this sounds like something you would like." In this case thanks are due to my sister Kate. In 11 days I'll be in New York City for Kate's wedding. It'll be a little strange because I'm not part of the wedding party as brothers and sisters usually are (both of my sisters were part of the bridal party.) Nope, instead of being part of the wedding party, I'll actually be performing the ceremony. I quickly learned that "performing the ceremony" is the best wording for what I'll be doing. Telling people that "I'm marrying my sister and her fiance" made my family sound like we should be on some new HBO drama.

During parties back in college I was known to perform an occasional drunken wedding in the basement of the BOX. I liked using the line "By the power vested in me by the state of intoxication, I now pronounce you..." (A line stolen from an episode of M*A*S*H.) I won't be acting under the power of intoxication next Friday, at least not until the reception. I just hope I don't accidentally perform several additional ceremonies while trying to relive the college fun.

BTW, you should take a listen to some Clem Snide (they're on iTunes,) I think you'd like it.